Tag Archive for ISNA

House Muslims Statistically Irrelevant

Good news! A new Gallup study demonstrates that Muslim-Americans give House Muslim organizations very little weight.

First, the New York Times gave us a heads up:

a study by the Abu Dhabi Gallup Center to be released next week found that only a minority of American Muslims say that domestic Islamic groups represent them

The study was just released and it stated:

many Muslims do not feel there is a national Muslim-American organization that represents them. When asked which of a list of national Muslim American organizations represents their itnerests [sic], 55% of Muslim men and 42% of Muslim women say that none do.

Open Letter to Brahim Zaibat from House Arabs and Muslims

A bunch of House Arabs and House Muslims wrote the following open letter to Brahim Zaibat, who until recently was Madonna’s “boytoy.” OK, they didn’t really write this, but they might as well could have, considering their strong desire to grovel to the US mainstream while the US rains death and destruction on innocent populations.

Dear Brahim,
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatu Allah. We are US-based Arab and Muslim organizations. We implore you to reconsider your recent decision to break up with pop star Madonna. Madonna is more famous than fame and you’re the first Arab Muslim to enjoy an intimate relationship with her. Are you out of your mind? Do you have any idea what’s at stake here?

Madonna does interfaith

Your behavior reflects poorly on all Arabs and Muslims. You make it look as if Islam is incongruent with Kabbalah and Judaism generally. We will have a hard time explaining your behavior to Zionists at upcoming interfaith dialogue meetings. Many of us have lost sleep contemplating how embarrassing it will be. We just got done swearing to them how happy we are about Osama Bin Laden’s death, then you came along and ruined everything. Now we’re back to square one, proving we’re a tolerant, peaceful bunch, no thanks to you. (Palestine is not discussed at these meetings, in case you were wondering).

Your relationship with Madonna had been the best thing for our image since Rima Fakih. You’re the first Arab Muslim to share a stage with the queen of pop. We couldn’t have dreamed of a more distinctive privilege. Do you know how many deaths your picture dancing alongside Madonna has prevented? When reminded of your relationship with Madonna, which proves our humanity, many a drone attack has been called off and many Arabs and Muslims have been removed off no-fly lists.
As you may know, Madonna is a staunch supporter of Israel. If you rejoin hands with her, you may change her mind to support the creation of a Palestinian state on a whopping 22% of historic Palestine. Do you understand now the kind of serious responsibility you owe the ummah?
In case you had pangs of conscience about dancing with the Material Girl or thought it may be inconsistent with Islam, rest assured that our own in-house sheikhs have issued a fatwa specifically allowing any and all behavior, from participating in beauty pageants to serving in the US Army and occupying Arab and majority-Muslim countries, as long as the end-result is assimilation into the US mainstream.
If you insist that you no longer want to be Madonna’s boytoy, could you at least talk her into considering any ADC intern as a replacement? They’ve got a lot of training dancing to the tunes of war played by the Republican and Democratic Parties.


The statement House Arabs and House Muslims Never Released about OBL

We are US-based Arab and Muslim organizations. We feel a compelling obligation to explain to our fellow Americans the meaning of the US killing of Osama bin Laden.

We take this opportunity to revisit the inconvenient fact that Osama Bin Laden and the Mujahideen were funded and supported by the US to fight the USSR in Afghanistan in the eighties. We recall that Ronald Reagan had called the Mujahideen “freedom fighters” when their interests coincided with the US’s. We remind ourselves that “Between 1978 and 1992, the US government poured at least US$6 billion (some estimates range as high as $20 billion) worth of arms, training and funds to prop up the mujaheddin factions.”

We note that the Mujahideen aligned themselves with the US, convincing themselves of the “lesser of two evils” argument. We recall that Zbigniew Brzezinski said:

The day that the Soviets officially crossed the border, I wrote to President Carter: We now have the opportunity of giving to the USSR its Vietnam war.

We learn an important lesson from this history and note that collaboration with the US is an immoral and counterproductive effort. Collaboration does not shield one from US persecution, neither is it a smart “strategy.” Aligning with powerful empires is foolish and self-defeating. The logic of House Muslims (or “House Negroes” as Malcolm X called the collaborators of his era) is short-sighted and idiotic.

We abhor the subtext of President Obama and Secretary Clinton‘s remarks, implying that the lives of millions of Afghanis, Iraqis and Pakistanis were worth somehow sacrificing in order to locate one ex-“freedom fighter” (as per Reagan’s words). Indeed, the President and Secretary of State did not even pay lip service to the countless lives devastated, weddings bombarded, children orphaned, spouses widowed, natural resources stolen. We condemn the hypocrisy of Secretary Clinton, who feigned concern for “innocent people” who were killed by OBL but not the innocent people in Afghanistan and Iraq for whose death she caused as Senator then as Secretary of State, or the innocent people in Palestine and Lebanon whose death by Israeli warplanes she supported. We cannot expect Obama and Clinton to apologize for the war crimes the US committed in pursuit of OBL, as it is not in empires’ nature to condemn themselves.

We are still haunted by the images of our sisters and brothers tortured in Abu Ghraib. The stench of scores of corpses from years of war, occupations and sanctions still fills the air. The emotional trauma of drones still terrorizes children. The dreary, bleak future facing millions of displaced Afghani and Iraqi refugees still shakes our conscience. White phosphorus and depleted uranium’s effects on public health and the environment will last for generations to come. That the US eliminated one of its ex-agents and claimed it was not waging war on Islam while war criminals continue to hold power in Washington and Tel Aviv offers us no relief.

We regret having spent the last decade begging for approval from the US mainstream, inviting US politicians to our conventions, having Ramadan iftars in the White House and embarrassing ourselves in a myriad of other ways. Now that OBL is finally dead, we look forward to freeing up the time we’d spent assuring everyone of our patriotism and swearing on the Qur’an that OBL did not represent us. We will no longer construct our discourse to sooth islamophobes’ racist anxieties. We will spend no more time emphasizing that OBL didn’t represent us than Christians assert that Obama, Clinton, Bush and Blair do not represent Christianity.

Instead, we will work on more urgent matters than pursuing the material comforts of the American dream, such as ending the occupation of Afghanistan, ending the occupation of Iraq, boycotting and dismantling “Israel,” closing Guantanamo, restoring civil liberties, ending US hegemony and racism.


American Arab Anti Discrimination Committee, Arab American Institute, American Task Force for Palestine, Council on American-Islamic Relations, Islamic Society of North America, Park51

White House Arabs

Naji Al-Ali


At its annual convention this year, ADC will be offering a White House tour to the first 100 earlybird registrants. An ADC intern has leaked to Ikhras a transcript of the tour guide’s spiel.

Ladies and gentlemen, on behalf of ADC I’m glad to offer you a tour of the White House. You should consider yourselves particularly lucky for this rare opportunity since we’re normally ignored by Obama.

You are prohibited from carrying the following items during this tour: firearms, cameras, inhalers, dignity.

Anyone who asks any questions about foreign policy or civil liberties will be immediately spat on, removed from the premises and lobotomized.

There’s also a new policy requiring all visitors to be barefoot. The White House does not assume responsibility for disappeared shoes.

Please make sure you carry government-issued ID (only US and Israeli governments-issued IDs are accepted). You may be strip-searched, probed and branded. We’ll also need fingerprints, a blood sample, a list of your political affiliations, full disclosure of any and all phobias and embarrassing secrets.

The White House has 132 rooms, 35 bathrooms, 412 doors, 147 windows, 28 fireplaces, 8 staircases and 3 elevators. Folk legend has it that Abraham Lincoln’s ghost still roams in the Lincoln Bedroom. There are also rumors that James Zogby lives under one of the staircases.

This used to be Barack Obama’s advisor Dalia Mogahed’s own office. Since the Secret Service realized her last name is derived from “jihad” she’s been doing her job from home via Skype. Ms. Mogahed expressed no hard feelings. Wouldn’t you like to be able to do your jobs in your pajamas?

This is the East Room, where receptions and parties are hosted. This room was literally a nightclub during Operation Cast Lead.

Here is the Diplomatic Reception Room. This is where several US presidents have met with Israeli prime ministers and Arab leaders to ensure US continued unconditional support for Israeli war crimes.

ISNA at the White House

This is the State Dining Room, where the President lets House Arabs and House Muslims eat his leftovers.

Moving on to the Oval Office. This is the United States’ control room. Operation Desert Storm, Operation Iraqi Freedom, Operation Enduring Freedom were all conceived and planned here. Ladies and gentlemen, you are witnessing the room where the murder, dispossession and displacement of millions of people are carefully planned everyday. If you thought this was impressive, wait until you check out our Pentagon tour next year (assuming you get security clearance).

This over here is the Prayer Room. The tour will take a 10-minute break to give everyone the chance to pray to US empire.

Thank you for joining us. As a souvenir of your visit to the White House today, everyone gets a piece of rubble from houses the US bombed in Vietnam, Korea, Afghanistan, Iraq, Pakistan or Libya. T-shirts that say “ADC gave me a tour of the White House and all I got was this lousy t-shirt” are available for $24.99 at the ADC headquarters. Have a great afternoon.

Wars Amongst House Muslims

ISNA at the White House

One wonders why the King hearings’ ” witness,” House Muslim Zuhdi Jasser, considers the Islamic Society of North Americapart of an insidious Muslim Brotherhood plot.” Jasser and the King hearings would be hard pressed to find anyone more docile than ISNA.

For example, at a time when the US is occupying two Muslim-majority countries (Afghanistan and Iraq), ISNA not only failed to protest these savage wars in any meaningful way, but it actually makes sure the spiritual needs of occupying soldiers are met (to the extent militarism requires spirituality). It advertises for Chaplain positions in the US Army, US Navy and US Air Force without even trying to put on a facade of peacefulness or making the slightest disclaimer that it doesn’t endorse the wars they’re engaged in. 

ISNA-Canada allegedly mismanaged charity money

Sent to us by reader Abu Jaleel:


Devout Muslims donated hundreds of thousands of dollars to one of Canada’s largest Islamic organizations on the promise that the cash would be used to help the poor.

But only one in four dollars donated to a special pool of money at the Islamic Society of North America Canada (ISNA Canada) actually reached the needy.

Mismanagement of more than $600,000 is among the findings in a scathing audit obtained by the Star.